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| EDITORIAL:
MUSIC Bourgeois Pigs DJs On Strike are set to overthrow the world's overblown DJ royalty. If only there was a guillotine handy... ---------------------------- VITAL INFO Age: Johnny: 56. Suspence: 32. Years in biz: Johnny: 8. Suspence: Longer than 8. Home: Johnny: Vostak, Antarctica. Suspence: Seattle. Genre: Top 40 Electronic. Residencies: Johnny: The Igloo, Vostak, Antarctica. Label Affiliations/Side Projects: Imputor, Pl*stiq Ph*ntom, Calculator Man & Hangar Favorite Track: Johnny: Vivaldi "Winter." Suspence: Paul Oakenfold "Starry Eyed Surprise." Favorite Album: Johnny: George Michael Faith. Suspence: The Muppet Show: Music, Mayhem and More! Inspirations: Johnny: Water, ice and solitude. Suspence: Chicago (the band). Their essential tracks or artist albums: "Stuff on Imputor" Favorite Sex Album: Our own. 37 minutes and designed for quick lovin'. ----------------------------
What's up with the Too Hot For Solid Steel Mix? All the songs really touch our hearts. We know that you and anybody want to hear Richard Marx, Bryan Adams and Gloria Estefan. They're great, and that's what was coming through the radio waves in Antarctica. It sounded good. Clearly, you have issues with superstar DJs. Just look at Paul Oakenfold, man. He's the poster boy. It's not all about him. It's just that no one's ever made fun of them yet. They just need to be made fun of. They're getting paid 50 grand to play records – somebody else's music. Most of them can hardly mix. That's the story. And BT just sucks. And Moby. But Richie Hawtin [he perks up], we love Richie Hawtin. He's just the baldest DJ there is. Wait, Hawtin's on your "Bald Balder Baldest" sticker (along with Goldie and Moby), right? But there's no sign of Carl Cox. BIG oversight. That's true. We might have to make a new sticker now. We'll do 'balderist.' Wow, man. You've shed new light... balder than Richie Hawtin. Didn't your mom tell you that if you can't say something nice, then don't say anything at all? Yeah she definitely said that. But my mom hasn't really talked about DJs On Strike. It's one of those things she doesn't think about. You know when you do something and your mom pretends like it's not happening? But we're not saying anything mean. We're entertaining other people at their [DJs'] expense and we enjoy it. Are you open to suggestions about you next targets? Okay, sure. Wedding DJs. Respect, man—that's somebody's special moment. We should do a tribute to wedding DJs. They would have good hair, I bet. Mullets are back in, aren't they? Especially on the wedding circuit. How about celebrity DJs? What's a celebrity DJ? You know, like, when some restaurant lets Gwyneth Paltrow get behind the decks. That just doesn't sound like a good idea. But maybe she's better than Paul Oakenfold. I bet she is. ---------------------------- THE REST IS HISTORY DJs On Strike was "cold, hard representin'" in Vostak. Life was about ice and water, seals and solitude, and cold, cold nipples. Between chillin' in their igloo and making beats on 386/486 desktops, Casio keyboards and calculator watches, they'd drop the occasional single onto their Website. From there, they launched their infamous sticker and flyer campaign. According to Arctic urban legend, DJ Food's Strictly Kev and DK invited Kawasaki and DJ Suspence to appear on their radio show in London. After traveling by barge for four months, they delivered the 37-minute mix, Too Hot For Solid Steel. Originally published in BPM Culture magazine, June 2003 Photo Credit: DJs On Strike |
